SPARKY'S SCIENTIFIC FINDING
Mainstream hidebound dinosaur scientists will claim there are nowhere near this many new planets, but the onus is on them to prove me wrong. There's one of those words, onus, that are tainted by their proximity to, well, you know. I like words like that. They're kind of dangerous by proxy, like "Did I just hear---?" But they really mean ordinary things. Kind of like one of these nerdy guys who like to dress up like cops and stop people for traffic violations. During the Labor Day Riots in Virginia Beach a few years back, there ended up being just one arrest, and it turned out to be by one of these guys. Have I mentioned that I believe Virginia Beach and Chesapeake are Satan's Territory? In a "banality of evil" kind of way. They lull you into thinking they're all about golf and lawn care and cosmetic surgery, and then BAM! they've got your soul. Just go to one of those places and look around. You'll see. I defy a scientist to prove me wrong.
Sparky Donatello
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Reader Comments (6)
Now I think you could make an argument for Urgina and if someone has a problem with that name you can always refer them to the planet that many mainstream hidebound dinosaur scientists have accepted for years - Uranus.
But there is still one question that plagues me -
#1 what do dinosaur scientists have to do with planets?
Hey, here's a funny story. I used to work in a design firm and Scholastic was one of our clients. We were designing these big activity cards for kids, and photographing everyday objects as models in order to measure the distances between the Earth and different planets. So the client calls and tell us that one of units of measurement will be toilet paper squares. So I'm on the phone with the client, and I say, "so exactly how much toilet paper is between the Earth and URANUS?" URANUS, get it??? Good times.